Unconditional love needs nurturing too

The only kind of true love possible is 'unconditional'. Yet, it needs to be nurtured like an infant all the time. Over time we start demanding and taking things for granted; thinking that our love has grown and matured over the years and might not need as much attention.

After Arushi was born, a friend of mine had caught me referring to my romantic life as a matter of the past. I was lucky to have taken her cue and have worked to bring back the silly spark in my relationship with my husband. I call it silly as I do things like send him a ‘miss you’ sms; add a line on his to- do list ‘Call Jaina’ (he does call me when he reads it and we just exchange a giggling hi); go for drives after Arushi sleeps etc. Its all pretty teeny; but it works for me ( I say me and not us as according to Kal (my husband) the spark had never dimmed)

Recently, a close friend of mine confided to me that she was seeing a marriage counselor. I am a little shaken-up. This is a person whom I have seen to be head-over-heals in love with her husband. I think that the fact that they recognized (and acted on it) that their love needs extra nurturing- itself was proof of their love. I am sure they will come out of this situation with a stronger bond and understanding.

I am sure we will all have our share of troubles and tests ( some will have a tougher ride then others); but the key is preserve and nurture. Lets not forget that!

Journey to motherhood

Before I was pregnant I had not realized how much my life was going to change. Having a baby was something all the women in the world did. It will not be such a big deal. Its natural. A women's body would have optimized the process with so many decades of evolution. I would know what to do. Also, I will know how to take care of the baby. I trust my 'Natural instincts'. 

Pregnancy was a roller coaster rider. With the pre-term labor and the 'tributaline' and tri-weekly (yup, not weekly or bi-weekly) visits to the ob-gy. That was just a prelude to my transformation. This was followed by sleepless night and back-breaking feeding sessions. My husband has already forgotten it all. I still wake up in the middle of the night to feel my belly. I am suppose to forget it all post- pregnancy ( its been 18 months since I had Arushi). But I have not, I have a clear and vivid memory of the contractions which would not stop; the kicks and tickles that made me giggle all the time; the new-born cry that makes you feel so helpless.

It still feels 'magical'. How could I produced a whole new human being? I did and I am proud of it. Will I go through it again? friends ask me and I must think about it again urges the family. I do not know that yet. Maybe or maybe not. But, this journey to becoming a mother had transformed me and humbled me. It has taught me 'patience' and 'giving' like I never knew I was capable of and the gratitude I feel towards my mother is beyond expression ( she says she is tired of hearing about it now but I am still overwhelmed by the thought of all she has done for me).

This is a tribute to all the mothers in the world. Like 'they' say, with every baby a mother is born.